I've been trying to track down an international payment that I sent from Korea to the United States that disappeared. I've been making phone calls to this and that place in America. I went to my bank here in Korea yesterday morning.
I've never been good at controlling my emotions, but when this started, I set myself the task of approaching it in a Stoic manner. What might easily might have become a conflict or showdown infused with emotion and hostility has become a fun, people-centered, and--if I may I say it--tasteful adventure.
When encountering rule-bound inflexibility and intransigence on the part of organizations, instead of getting upset at the lack of simple fairness, being calm allows you to think of different approaches. It also gives you confidence. By not being emotional, you don't needlessly undermine the moral authority of your objective.
One customer service representative I spoke to misunderstood the bad connection on the international phone call as my deliberate refusal to speak clearly. He said, like an infuriated parent, "You WILL NOT mumble!". It was obnoxious, and actually, vicious, but staying task-focused allowed me to finish giving him the information that was the point of my phone call. Later, talking to a different customer service representative with a different organization, the previous person having been so rude, praising her good manners was all the sweeter!
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